From what I can remember in The Grinch movies, what our somehow loveable anti-hero really had going on was a 39½ foot pole's worth of childhood trauma that was triggered by the whos Christmas carol singing. Now, as little as I'd like to associate with a sea-sick crocodile, one thing I can relate to is being triggered. Whether it be getting triggered into anger, or any other points on the emotional spectrum, being in recovery makes us very aware of triggers to use. And by "use', I mean our DOCs.
Much like our Christmas-despising friend on the silver screen, I had a situation happen that made me a little green recently. I got the opportunity to help someone. Now this did make my heart grow three sizes that day, but it also sent me on a bit of a trigger trip. Not only was the person involved seeking help, but they were seeking help from a situation that mirrored my pre-recovery very closely. I have to keep the details about this private for the people involved, but I do want to share a bit about how I handled staring myself in the face through this other person who sought help.
"It's because I'm green, isn't it?” —The Grinch
Triggers can come in all shapes and sizes, sights, sounds, and smells. There are too many to really list here and some triggers can be very detailed. Today I am very grateful that when being faced with the smell of my EXACT DOC (down to the brand), I was triggered to feel sick and not to crave using it again. This situation gave me the opportunity to respond, instead of react. Something I've been working on most of the summer, as well as my entire recovery journey in general.
So, what I'd like to leave you all with here is that the hard work we put into our recovery can tangibly pay off. Even though it can be hard to learn some of these life skills we need to transform our suffering into gratitude, we really can learn how to respond to our surroundings instead of reacting to them. We really can discipline ourselves into a life of joy from being a mean one, a vile one, and from having a heart like an empty hole. Plus no one likes termites in their teeth.
Happy Holidays Homies
