Tap. Tap. Tap.. Is this thing on? I get to write my first(ever) blog today. I've never done anything like this before so I think what we're going to do is a brief overview of my "story" and see if I get any return customers. The next blog will be an entirely new adventure. Ok, the stage fright is wearing off. So here goes nothing...
Early life was turbulent for me. Family illness, multiple car accidents (affecting myself and the rest of my family), loss of close loved ones, an emotionally and physically abusive parent, and a judgmental religious environment cultivated just the right emotional ecosystem to reap, sow and harvest multiple mental health challenges that eventually included suicidal ideation and two separate attempts. Not to mention my skewed view of what a relationship should be, romantic or otherwise, all the way into my early thirties. All this had left addiction just the right anchor point it needed to gain the strongest hold anything had ever had on me for my entire life.
After over 15 years of struggling with that addiction(substance use disorder), alcohol with a few other substances here and there on occasion, I am in long-term recovery(finally). The lifestyle I chose, before finding recovery, brought me to death’s door more than once as an adult. And let me tell you, being that close to meeting Death was not the most fun place I've been during this life. After trying all the options I knew of to end my substance use disorder, without any lasting success, gaining over 200lbs, flatlining in a hospital bed, losing my grip on fatherhood, and the will to live for any reason at all. I had finally hit my lowest “rock bottom”. In one of the deep dark corners of my beaten and batter mind, I knew there had to be more. Or at least a better way of life that I had somehow completely missed. It was terrifying. The "end" was drawing near and part of me was anticipating the pain and struggle finally being over with, while another part wanted, so desperately to actually live my life(truly live it with a sense of purpose, I needed more, I knew it existed, somewhere).
After someone reached out and helped me find the strength to get into a Medication Assisted Treatment Program. Since then I’ve become healthier spiritually, emotionally & physically, enjoying life with my son. Recovery has given me the opportunity to build a career helping people in early recovery while mending relationships my addiction had damaged. As well as crafting new, lasting, relationships in and out of the recovery community.
"Recovery has given me the opportunity to build a career helping people"
After gaining some traction, and owning my recovery for myself, I realized renewing my Faith in God was the next step up in my recovery process. I claimed victory over my addiction in the name of Jesus Christ in September 2022 and my life has exploded with blessings and abundance ever since.
I am now living my journey out loud because long-term recovery helped me change my life for the better, and I want to make it possible for others to do the same. I remember the pain and hurt of active substance use disorder. I know I can give a helping hand to those searching for what I was once overwhelmingly desperate for.
That's what I have for today. Life really sucked for a long time. I got sober, for a few years, and honestly, life was better but seemed to be stuck in black and white. My spiritual walk started to pull me out of that. Then one day I met this guy that kept saying "We can have fun in recovery!". Long story short (maybe that will be my blog for tomorrow), my life has more purpose, glow, and depth since then. I live in a place where my son isn't worried if daddy isn't going to wake up today and I get interrupted from writing my recovery blog to be in my boss's recovery podcast(sober problems man...it was fabulous). I hope someone enjoys this. Or maybe someone can pull some hope or motivation from this to reach out for help(217recovery.com), from what I've shared.
Ok ya'll, I'm going to church. I'll be back tomorrow afternoon with some new words. Never hesitate to reach out(firstname.lastname@example.org or click here)with any questions or if you'd like to start a conversation about something you've read here today. Bye!
P.S. Listen to the podcasts (https://www.217recovery.com/podcast) Just do it! Can I say that here??