Updated: Feb 10
Way too often since getting sober and slowly picking up the pieces of my life; I so easily forget the depths of hell I have submerged from and just how much I should be dropping to my knees daily with gratitude for my blessings; daily. “High class” problems, so many reference the things that we feel are unfair when life could truly be so much worse. I’d say most of my problems today are nothing compared to the troubles and worries I experienced in active addiction. The worst part? 95% of those heartaches and agonizing pains, were self inflicted and bled over to tear at the lining of the hearts in all my loved ones chest cavities. Unfortunately this is all impossible to see at the time. Poison is poison in my opinion, choice of which substance has/had you paralyzed to the point of insanity and tumultuous decision making. We not only were destroying ourselves physically; we were murdering our minds, our souls, and our loved ones. As they had to make those hard decisions to sit idly by, walk away, or get straight jacket crazy right along with us. Trying to want it more than we did, which is absolutely, positively impossible.
1.) Defying the odds
2.) Loving someone from afar
3.) Recognizing that love from afar and knowing it was the best thing they could do
6.) God’s grace
7.) Unconditional love
8.) Elise Corinne, mommy is coming to see you Saturday 🥰🥰
9.) Jamie Lynn, what on earth could I have ever done so right to deserve this woman??
10.) My family
I can’t tell you what it takes for each individual to make that decision to change everything; I can only tell you my story. I can’t tell you why addiction claimed so many lives, and will only continue to. I can tell you, 10%. 10% will completely make it out of that self hating hell and vicious cycle indefinitely, with hopes of sharing their story that I pray to God. Inspires others to change. I know that life can always be worse, and I need to take more time to count my blessings. And I also know this; if no one has told you they love you today. I love you.